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India Day #1
Tonight I make my way from IAD dulles international airport to mysore, India. It feels surreal to me as I type these words. I simultaneously feel magic in and all around me that wants to present itself in the emotional form of tears. Last night I said goodbye to my daughter in person, my partner over the phone. I wept like a baby and cried myself to sleep.
This morning I would awake to decide to sleep in until my weekly Gabor Mate Compassionate inquiry training meeting. I did 3 yoga classes yesterday and decided to skip the gym and do an at home practice before my flight this evening.
Centering myself and feeling my feelings fully. Yesterday I saw my therapist and spoke about my hopes and fears.
Today I am ever present with it all. Reminded that grief is just love with no where to go. I guess this is the journey. Pouring all of that love back into myself instead of outwardly as I am seperated from my loved ones these two months.
I watched myself calm my nervous system last night even as I broke down into tears of knowing how much I will be missing the people I love the most. Coming back to my breath, back to my body is and has always been the practice.
The nervous system regulation seemed to come sooner than it would have previously in my life. My ego wants to tell me that is a marker of my success. My spirit and soul…
